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Krista

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Hiya lezzers!

I got marshmallows and gluten-free graham crackers, so…

WHO WOULD LIKE TO NOTICE A SCARY TALE??

MWAH





HA HAHAHAHA!

Get friend. Every person got your own buddy? Good. Hang on fast your friend’s hand.

‘Cause this is exactly a real story.

Ahem.

Once upon a time, when I was very newly homosexual I Did Not even understand I Happened To Be recently homosexual…

An older lesbian from the now-defunct queer bar known as


Za’s


in Green Bay, Wisconsin

(I was entirely merely there to dancing)


gave me some guidance:

1)


Never ever start a mutual bank account along with your enthusiast



2)


Cannot fake orgasms



3)


Ensure a female’s fingernails tend to be thoroughly clean.

The wise lesbian was a student in her belated 40’s, an age group thus far far from my personal 19-years-old-with-a-fake-ID home that i really couldn’t also think about just what it need to be want to be thus old.

Just how unfortunate, I Was Thinking. Right here she is at a bar and she’s old. I’m hoping Really don’t end lonely like her.

Actually it enjoyable as the biggest market of your own personal market?

Exactly what slightly crap I was.

For some reason, however, I was presented with from

Za’s


that night saying the woman three policies to my self.

Whenever I woke up, I thought ones.

It was similar to during the Silver Chair, whenever Polly and Eustace Scrubb tend to be charged by Aslan to consider The indicators.


Cannot become you don’t re-read your own Narnia boxed-set at least once a year.

In any event! throughout the years, i usually remembered the three life classes the lesbian had instructed me personally. The woman information made sense.

We never launched a joint bank account with anyone.

We never ever faked sexual climaxes once more following the first few instances i did so it, realizing I happened to be, actually, dooming myself to a perpetual cycle of shitty intercourse by enjoyable bad overall performance using my cries of “ecstasy.”

And I constantly privately examined a lady’s fingernails before I slept with her.

Brief? Check.

No scratchy sides? Inspect.

Clean? It’s search time.

But precisely why, sluts?


What is the big issue about fingernails?


What’s from the short-nailed lesbian laughs? Exactly What?

After all, alright, I have it. It is tougher to bang with extended nails. You could maybe puncture a lung or something.

But it is perhaps not impossible. I have had long fingernails before for burlesque programs; screwin’ with ‘em is not all those things tough — you only make sure to make use of the shields of the fingers.

So just why ended up being that lesbian very emphatic about clean nails?

All of you, she had been



SO. EMPHATIC.

I made the decision to-do some debunking.

Surely nothing could really occur any time you got screwed by some body with dirty nails.

Following we recalled an account therefore awful I would very nearly forgotten it.

Homos.

Poor crap can happen.

This scary story comes to us courtesy of my good-looking friend ”


Cai



,” who has viewed a lot more pussy in heating than a kitty clinic on Free Spay time.

Okay.

Cai


was in Miami when she found a really hot femme we are going to contact


Katie.

Katie


smelled like glucose cookies cooking, used a leopard-print swimsuit, had huge silver hoops that shimmered for the light, in addition to possessed one of the best asses


Cai


had ever seen.

explore the possibilities of chat room lesbian

She privately texted me personally a photo of

Katie

at the pool so she could boast, and that I texted straight back,


“i might hit that till my personal hand decrease down.”

So, yes,


Katie.

Cai


took


Katie


home that evening. There was indeed some major consuming.

While getting undressed


Katie


from inside the half-light,


Cai


watched some thing she had not actually seen before:



Katie had cool nails.

Indeed,




Katie




had an extended, rhinestone-tipped French manicure. Juuuust like Rihanna.

Cai


could not stop the mental image of these fingernails clawing down her back while she fucked


Katie


, very animalistic gender commenced.

Cai


also allow

Katie


bang this lady, and even though she normally never allows anyone do this. What the hell, she figured. Going home the next day. Never see this lady again. I am able to get topped for a night.

Why don’t we fast-forward 2-3 weeks, shall we?

One thing ended up being completely wrong with


Cai’s


“area.”

Severely, really incorrect. It itched. It burnt.

Some, um, greenish-yellowish material was actually oozing from it. So when I say some i am talking about exorbitant. amounts. of. pus.

Cai


refused to go right to the lady-doctor.

Because being encouraging is exactly what relationship is about, when she explained, I said,


“So you eventually got the clap. Whorebag.”

Cai


chuckled nervously. She went home, googled “the clap” and became believing that she performed, without a doubt have gonorrhea. She decided to go, for the first time actually ever


(she had been 28),


to our queer-friendly community gyno hospital.

They failed to know very well what had been completely wrong along with her.

They tried this lady for gonorrhea. They tested for syphilis, herpes, HPV, chlamydia, the works. Nothing.

Cai


was a student in some pain. She needed responses. She was indeed getting the


‘pus’


in


“pussy”


for nearly four weeks today.

So that they provided the lady an ultrasound.

AND WOULD YOU GUESS WHAT THEY DISCOVERED.

Vaginal rips. All over the inside of her vag.

A significant load of rips.

Cai


was indeed ripped to shreds. Her insides were hanging in ribbons. Appeared to be crepe paper birthday celebration accessories inside.

And every thing – every last inch – had been contaminated.

It can look that whenever Katie used the woman fabulous long fingernails to provide

Cai


a vigorous drunk-fuck, no body understood that the woman fingernails happened to be in addition a festering breeding ground for



bacterial vaginosis

.

Astonishing.

Cai


states are a stone-cold very top since.

My personal companion wikipedia says you can acquire horrible infections from dirty fingernails. Obviously, you will find sometimes staphylococcus microbes hangin’ out, which can result in anything from epidermis boils to motherfucking meningitis.

And guess what more?

Pinworm eggs.

S’all I’m gonna state.

That wise lesbian was actually spot-on with her existence classes.

Never open a joint checking account along with your partner.

Never ever fake sexual climaxes.

And holy mommy of god, check a unique trick’s fingernails before banging.

Or perhaps you are doomed to endure the fortune of Cai.

THE FINISH

I Must wonder, though…

Have of y’all actually obtained any such thing awful from another women’s fingers?

Or heard of a person that performed?

Or is this mainly



(‘cept for Cai)



a lesbian metropolitan myth?

My fingers tend to be inching towards travel-sized Purell package.

I need answers.